speaking of creatives... know anybody??

I posted the following on CareerBuilder today -- if you know anyone who fits the bill, have them reply to either this blog or click here to go to the job post and apply from there. Thanks!
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Greetings! I’m the marketing manager for a small yet very successful specialty chemical company located in scenic South Jersey. (Well, the surrounding area is nice, but to tell the truth we’re in an average industrial park just off 295. It’s easy to get to, though, which is always a plus.)

We in the marketing department have a bit of a dilemma… We have LOTS of advertising and collateral projects that sail through here on a daily basis, but alas – we are currently lacking a full-time in-house creative to handle them. Let me stop you here for a moment and ask you to go back and re-read that last line. Notice that I distinctly said “creative” and not “graphic designer?” There’s a reason for this.

Graphic designers are exactly that: designers of graphics. While I’ve met many that have phenomenal technical skills and can do things with software I can’t even dream of, they tend to put “pretty” ahead of “meaningful” in the hierarchy of what’s really important for an ad or collateral piece. Not that I mind pretty – I’m all for that – but meaningful definitely has to come first.

What we’re really looking for is a hybrid of sorts. A true chimera of the creative realm, if you will. First and foremost, we need an innovative problem solver who uses intuition and logic in equal measure in their work. We need a writer who can bridge the gap between our company and the consumer through metaphor and emotion. Someone who can make simple images speak volumes, as well as use concise prose to create voluminous images in the reader’s mind. We also need that same person to have the technical ability to bring these ideas to life within the specified media format. (This is where the graphic design skills need to kick in.) We need someone who is able to communicate complex concepts clearly and innovatively in a variety of ways.

I won’t ask that you fit into narrow parameters such as a certain number of years of experience or a degree in a particular field; I know that the paths to great marketing are as varied as the day is long. I will ask, however, that you will have garnered intimate knowledge of both basic advertising and visual design principles somewhere along that path. Software skills will be assessed. Portfolios will be reviewed.

If we choose you for the position, you will be responsible for advertising concept, design and placement, collateral design and copywriting [editor’s note: If your English papers were routinely covered in red pen, kindly move on to the next ad], trade show visuals and booth construction, and whatever other corporate creative needs get lobbed through our department’s door.

You must be passionate about your craft and possesses great internal motivation to continually learn new things and rise to new challenges. You must be able to think on the fly, work independently, pay attention to detail, handle deadline pressures with grace and a sense of humor, and juggle multiple projects without letting any of them hit the ground with a resounding thud.

This position offers lots of variety (from the cool whiz-bang to the utterly mundane) and affords a great degree creative latitude. It also comes with mediocre wages, generally normal hours, and an exceedingly respectable benefit package, as well as an office with a real door and a functioning window. The people here are great to work with, and we occasionally have free pizza days.

Now for the moment of reckoning: do you apply or not?

If you have even the slightest doubts about whether this position is right for you, you’re probably right. Follow your gut. Put this ad down now and walk away. Don’t look back.

If you feel your talents might be tailor-made for this position and you’d like to check the fit, write me a letter. Sure, we want all the normal resume facts-and-figures stuff, but really – write me a letter. Don’t stuff it full of the normal cover letter blah-blah-blah; really introduce yourself. Tell me about you, your abilities, your experiences. Intrigue me. Make me want to call you for an interview.

Moe and his creator get weed whacked...

Oh well, looks like Moe won't be gracing the pages of anything anytime soon. After review with the sales guys we decided to "go in a different creative direction." (They didn't like the ad.) Back to the drawing board.

This would not be too big of a deal (happens more than I care to think about), except that I fired our designer two weeks ago. (That also happens more than I care to think about.) Finding someone with any kind of creative smarts AND technical skill AND a modicum of professional / artistic integrity is apparently like trying to find a fish on the moon.

It amazes me that there are so many uncreative "creatives" out there. They come in, putz around FOREVER to get an ad together, end up with some pathetic mediocre thing that just begs to crawl under a rock and never see the light of day minutes before the deadline , and then they call it a day. Never even lose a minute's sleep over it. And they have the nerve to call themselves "creatives." Ugh, makes me crazy...

Where's the PASSION!?!? Where's the CREATIVE DRIVE?!?! Where's the VISION?!?! Don't even get me started...

So now until we find a replacement I'm doing my job AND his. Oh well, not like I was trying to get anything on MY desk finished this week...